About an hour ago, as I was perusing my Twitter feed, I came across a video link that had been posted by Alyssa Milano.
I not only found the video quite funny, but I was quite intrigued by the theory it expounded. For those of you who lack the ability to push the play button on the above link, the theory is this:
Twitter allows the average joe (or joe-ette) to be ignored by those in the realm of celebrity faster than the old days when we had to send written letters to various fan clubs (which I have never done). In other words, it is a great time saver in regards to rejection.
Within minutes I decided that a test of the theory was in order. But, who to contact? Hmmm. I didn't ponder long as the most obvious choice was the original poster (poster n. one who posts) of the link.
So, around 3:57 EST, after wiping my sweaty palms, I typed the following message to Alyssa via Twitter:
timmybits @Alyssa_Milano Thanks for posting that awesome video. Don't worry about saying "You're Welcome", just read this: http://bit.ly/9owQcC
The link I left her was to a previously written post challenging her to a Literary Duel. You can read the article "Ten things you don't know" by Boyle & Milano here.
Having sent that message, I immediately followed it up with the following statement...again via Twitter:
timmybits I'm about to be ignored by @Alyssa_Milano.
She has 'til 8:00pm EST. I'll let you know. Until then: http://bit.ly/ampSPL
I was all prepared for this nice dramatic countdown, and was looking forward to the moment the clock would strike...8. It was to be this long drama that would sadly end with my carriage turning back into a pumpkin (It's not perfect imagery, but you get the point). However, at 4:30 EST (long before 8:00pm), the following message appeared in my Twitter feed:
Alyssa_Milano @timmybits Hi.
GET OUT OF HERE! I almost fell of my couch. And that, considering I didn't fall off it yesterday when the earthquake hit, should tell you something.
Well, there you go! Hollywood starlett Alyssa Milano said "Hi" to Canadian Joe Timmy Boyle. I'll never wash my Twitter again.
Let the record state: Alyssa Milano acknowledged my greeting in 33 minutes and for that we give her three thumbs up (I've had an extra thumb since birth). Now, as cool as that may be, there are still three questions that remain.
Does Timmy really have three thumbs? Did Alyssa read the link before she responded? And if she did... Is she up to the literary challenge?
Here's thinking that we'll never know. Why? Because it's Twitter.
Although it was a rare but very nice gesture, Ayssa Milano isn't about to strike up a real conversation or get into some writing challenge with some anonymous...Twit (Twit n. A person who communicates on Twitter).
Infact, my good friend @Vanster, who connected with Ben Stiller some time ago on my behalf, kindly pointed out that Alyssa "probably thinks (I'm) some creepy stalker guy."
But, that's crazy talk. I mean, everyone knows that creepy stalker guys always preface each attempted contact with the words, "I'm not a creepy stalker guy..."
There are no creepy stalker guys that just say "Hey". They say things like:
"I'm not a creepy stalker guy, but I wanted to say 'Hey'..." or
"I'm not a creepy stalker guy, but I would love to meet you..." or
"I'm not a creepy stalker guy, but I do watch you through your curtains every evening..."
Anyways, hopefully Alyssa understands that I'm just a nice Canadian dude who was impressed with her wit and wants to have a little writing competition. And surely a good ol' girl from Brooklyn wouldn't turn down a friendly challenge.
But, with that being said, it's probably in her best interest to stick with "Hi" and pretend to ignore the whole Literary Duel. I mean, after all...I'd probably wipe the floor with her as a writer.
You still listening, Alyssa? You know where to find me...
Read "Ten Things You Don't Know" by Boyle & Milano
What about the video you ask? It's real funny...and mostly true.
Have a good one,