Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Palin-Timmy 2011

Of course!

It was as clear as a frosted window in December!

The game plan for 2011 and the key to my success...

Mama Grizzlies!

When I mentioned it to my wife (and BFF), she pursed her lips, scrunched her brow, pulled the covers over her head and muttered, “Turn off the vacuum!”

Maybe I should give you a little back story.

A little over two weeks ago, I was waiting with eager anticipation for the clock to strike midnight and the calendar to switch over to 2011. Well…the clock did its job, but the calendar just sat there. Fail!

After kissing my wife (long and passionately), singing Auld Lang Syne (with a little beatboxing) and vacuuming the living room (nude, of course) – a tradition that symbolizes living life to the fullest – I sat down to reflect on 2010 and the year ahead.

In that monastically silent moment, I had to man up to my errors (although extremely few) and prepare to face the unknown. As visions of my past danced with hopes for my future, I rode an emotional rollercoaster which left me tossing up my last meal of 2010.

Staring into the toilet, I flushed, what was originally, an absolutely awesome spaghetti dinner down the drain. It was then, as the clean water re-filled the bowl, I experienced the A-HA moment I was seeking.

Mama Grizzlies!

Sarah Palin, future prime minister of Canada and eventual queen of the entire planet – I’m just sayin’ - used this term to invoke an image of the vigilant protection of everything we hold dear…or she was supporting mean women wearing fur.

I suppose I could’ve Googled it, but why? Because it doesn’t really matter what she meant because it’s the coiner of the term, not the term itself, which fascinates me.

Princess Sarah, possess’ a certain je ne sais quoi…or as the English would say, “The Wow Factor”. She speaks with passion. “Wow!” She waves with conviction. “Wow!” She married Todd. Seriously? Todd? “Wow…”

Anyways, as a result, Sarah Palin has gone viral!

Her meteoric rise among the American people, from Mayor of some small town in Alaska (a suburb of Russia) to Vice Presidential candidate of the United States (a suburb of Canada) to celebrity superstar has been nothing short of epic!

Now, that’s what I’m talkin’ about! And, I’m willing to fight anyone - who is shorter, slower & smaller than me…and is preferably blind – who wants to refudiate my analysis.

How did she do it?

By making up words like refudiate.

The Mama Grizzly of Mama Grizzlies, by vigilantly protecting her quirky, unconventional self, has successfully blazed a trail…across the grain! And, like her or not, she’s still moving forward.

You go, girl!

So today, when I read LSSU’s annual “List of Words to be Banished”, I knew exactly what I had to do.

Use each of those 14 words (which include 2 Palinisms) in this post…

…’cause that’s the way I roll.

Timmy - Palin 2011: Going Against the Grain

P.S. I coined the word "coiner".
Have a good one,
Timmy

3 comments:

  1. oh my. . . I hope you have lots of sugar for all the Tea Partyers that are gonna come after you.

    I totally love your lack of diplomacy and carefree "who cares about Canadian/American" relationship attitude.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Glad you're back from the dead! You've got my vote, but Sarah may want it to be Palin - Timmy 2011
    -FringeGirl

    ReplyDelete

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