Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Saved from an AWESOME mistake!

Whew! That was close.

Let me start by saying, I’m so thankful for people like Margaret Andrews - the wonderfully creative and supernaturally insightful author of Nanny Goats in Panties. Not only does her blog often make me laugh, but yesterday she single-handedly saved me from making the biggest mistake of my virtual life!

You see, in a desperate attempt to more effectively establish my online identity, I dedicated many waking (and sometime sleeping) hours to the intense study of Twitter bios. Noting everything of significance, I eventually compiled enough data to fill 14 notebooks. After transferring the information into an Excel spreadsheet…patterns quickly emerged.

My bio was clearly lacking…in style and substance. There’s no way so many people could be wrong. I realized I had to change or risk being lost in the crowd…as millions of other self promoters marched boldly passed (and over) me.

Brimming with excitement, I began crafting my new...and exponentially more effective, bio.

The most common theme among the online experts was...personal "Awesomeness". It is near impossible to explain awesomeness in 140 characters or less. In fact, I don’t think you can even write “awesomeness” in 140 characters. Well…you could, but you’d have to leave out a lot of very necessary exclamation points.

Now, even though others had attempted it…I wasn’t about to cram my awesomeness.

So, I started my bio like this…

"Hey, I’m Timmy…but you can call me Awesome."


The link would then lead them to my more complete bio…

"I used to be “working for the man” just like you…but, not anymore. I’m an Entrepreneur…with a capital E (which you’ll notice I actually used in the word “Entrepreneur”…because I believe it!). Now, you might find this a little hard to grasp but…I love sports, sex and fart jokes. That’s right. I’m not your regular, run-of- the-mill man. With my incredibly perfect wife (and BFF) – who cooks, cleans & looks like a swimsuit model 24-7 - at my side, I have managed to fulfill so many personal dreams…I simply can’t dream fast enough! In fact, I think I’ve already lived the life of three men! Crazy, eh? How do I keep sane while riding this freakingly crazy ride called life? By pashunately sharing the pashun of pashuns which we are so incredibly pashunate about. My goal (or pashun if you will) is to help you and the rest of the world - who pretty much suck at life - personally experience the awesomeness you deserve…but has evaded you. Believe it or not…it is possible for you to be almost as awesome as me. So, do yourself a favour and connect with me. I not only have the answers…I am the answer. BTW…I’m also awesome at, and pashunate about, marketing. Develop your unique brand by checking out my “Marketing Tips from a Marketing Maven, Strategist & Guru" Fan Page. Peace out, Brethren."

Moments away from posting this, I read Margaret’s words:  *Check 'em out: HERE

Apparently, the majority isn’t always right.

Thanks Margaret…for stopping me from looking foolish!


Have a good one,
Timmy

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7 comments:

  1. Ba-HAHAHA!!!!
    I love your extended profile. Thank you for showing us what could have been. You totally GET IT!

    Also? You're welcome. For saving your life. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I ♥ your awesomeness and pashun...thanks to both of you for laughs the last two days.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Margaret, I'm glad you appreciated it...and that you got to me just in time.

    Exit178, my pashun is what I'm pashunate about. And, thank you...for laughing.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Fabienne...The awesome are awesome. There's only so many ways to say it.

    ReplyDelete
  5. You're so funny! That profile cracked me up. But, now you've got me worried...I better go check to see what I've written for my bio. I fear it's lacking in a BIG way.
    -Fringegirl

    ReplyDelete
  6. Fringegirl...fix it now. Awesomeness waits for no man (or woman).

    ReplyDelete

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