Thursday, April 21, 2016

10 Reasons I won't be replacing Michael Strahan on LIVE

Well, it's the end of an era...if four years can be considered an era.  Recently, Michael Strahan shocked the television world by announcing he'll be leaving LIVE for Good Morning America.  The rumour mill is circling.  Who will be Kelly Ripa's next right hand man?

LIVE's Kelly Ripa with Timmy Boyle.  Is Timmy the new Michael?
Timmy the new Michael?

Nope.  Not me.'s not that I wouldn't appreciate the gig but here are:

10 Reasons I won't be replacing Michael Strahan on LIVE

10 - Not even a seasoned Hollywood stylist could fix my bed head in time to go LIVE

Timmy Boyle Bad Hair Day
An epic challenge

9 - Ripa has way too much tenure to accept second billing on the all-new "Timmy & Kelly"

8 - The network has an insanely archaic policy that hosts must wear pants

7 - My demands that Alyssa Milano be a special co-host five times a week would most likely be rejected

Timmy Boyle with Alyssa Milano - B&W
I'd watch that show!

6 - Due to a slight misunderstanding, I can't legally be within 100 ft. of Kelly

5 - I'd have to move...and, despite my best efforts, I simply can't manouevre a trailer

4 - The ongoing feud between myself & Disney-ABC...who have steadfastly ignored my extremely reasonable requests to be the next official Disney Princess

Disney Princess Timmy Boyle joins the other princesses
There's a new Princess in town...

3 - I'm holding out for Good Morning America

2 - My latest fortune cookie read, "You won't host LIVE"...which is weird, but super hard to dismiss

1 - Rumours, which I've started, are saying it'll come down to me or Neil Patrick Harris.  In that case, I would defer to Neil because I'm pretty sure he hasn't worked since Doogie Howser.

Doogie Howser
Give it to Doogie...

Tell me who you think would be the best choice now that I'm out of the running (unless they change the pants rule)...

Keep on laughin',
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